Years ago, I did a surf and yoga retreat in Bali where I learned to surf for the first time. Many in the group were first-timers as well, so we were taken to a sweet little beach with “baby waves” – which I can assure you felt like tidal waves to a surf newbie. There was definitely some fun, but also a LOT of salt water up my nose and in my eyes. And sand in places I won’t mention.
I was working with a client recently on resilience, specifically on how to get yourself out of a funk that’s keeping you stuck and mired down. It can be like quicksand – once you’re stuck in it, it’s incredibly hard to hoist yourself out so you just keep sinking deeper and deeper. In those moments of having a nose and throat full of salt water, it would have been so easy to give up on surfing for the day or forever.
Some people will say things like, “You just have to pull yourself out of it and get back in there!” – but that does no one any good. HOW do I do that??!
Turns out, there are specific steps you can take to move you from a stuck place back into momentum.
In fact, there are probably multiple ways to go about it, this is simply my own stepwise process to moving out of stuckness and tapping into resilience we all have:
Move your body – much of the time we are mentally stuck, we are actually PHYSICALLY stagnant as well. Find a way to move your body, however you can – get up from your chair and walk around the room. Go outside for a walk, no matter how short or long. Lay down on the floor in another room and put your legs up against the wall. Put on your favorite dance song, turn the volume WAY up, and dance wildly for the full song. Chop some vegetables. Vacuum a room. JUST MOVE!
Say and repeat a new belief – being stuck is almost always accompanied by wickedly harsh inner thoughts. We can be our own worst critic, and our own worst enemy. Like meditation where we are meant to notice when we drift, and pull ourselves back, we need a new belief to focus on when the vicious beliefs start snapping away. That becomes your new habit…notice when the critical belief is bearing down on you, stop, focus on the new belief.
Take one step forward, no matter how small – action is the enemy of stuckness. When we’re in motion, focusing on and doing something, we are naturally unsticking ourselves and there is no space for the hard thoughts. Have a plan ready and waiting with parts broken down to bite-sized steps you can jump into at a moment’s notice.
There are times we need a moment to wallow or lick our wounds…when you’re done with that moment, shift into these three steps to start moving yourself forward again!
